NLP & GO

(C) 2025.  All rights reserved to Shlomo Kory,  Jerusalem,  Israel. 

 

 

The Main part of this technique consists of 3 steps--Each of these steps is how people who have a relaxed disposition calm themselves down-- albeit unconsciously.  By following these steps,  you,  too, can help yourself  unwind and calm down whenever you want to relax or fall asleep...

 

Before you start it is important to turn off your cellular phone because if you are anticipating  phone calls,  it will interfere with this technique. 

 

I suggest that you first read and understand each step.  Then practice each of these steps separately.  Finally ,  when you feel familiar with all 3 steps,  find a comfortable place to sit back and proceed by putting the steps together.

 

1) Breathing--  . Inhale gently through your nose,   hold your breath for 2 for 3 seconds  (do NOT strain yourself!) and release it gently through your mouth.  When you inhale,  fill up the lower part of your lungs first and then the upper part of your lungs. Do this at a moderate pace.  After taking a few breaths begin the second step...

 

2) Peripheral Vision --  There are two kinds of Vision:  Peripheral and Foveal.  Foveal Vision is when you are concentrating on something such as looking at something, at a person,  reading something, etc.  

 

 Peripheral Vision means that you are aware of what is in front of you,  but not concentrating on anything in particular.  It is a way of disconnecting from the world.

 

To go into Peripheral vision,  look at a small spot several feet in front of you--For example,  at a light switch,  or a spot on the wall or on an object, etc.   Then,  as you  continue  looking  at it,  let your eyes relax , and let your scope of vision expand sideways to take in other things in front and to the side of you.  

 

As you do this.  continue the breathing described above. 

 

3) Thoughts and Self- Talk --While you continue doing these two steps ,  occupy your mind with a pleasant,  relaxing thought.  For example, the seashore or  the mountains, etc   . While picturing this pleasant scene  say to yourself " I am going to relax now". Repeat this phrase  at a moderate pace and with a gentle voice tone.  

 

 [NOTE: Using the terminology "I am going to"  is usually more effective than saying "I want to "  or   "I have to".  "I am going to"  has a nuance of what you are planning to do whereas "I want to"  is more forceful.  "I have to " is even more forceful and can imply an inner conflict.  When your goal is to relax,  forceful language is probably not going to be effective.   The phrase "I would like to " is usually  too noncommital and will probably not be effective either ]  

 

4) Additional Self -Talk --Once you have mastered using the above 3 steps you can add a fourth step. When a person is active and busy his mouth is ready to speak,  his arms and legs are ready to move.  Therefore,  to calm onself down the following can also help.  

 

Say to yourself:  "I have no one I have  to talk to so I can just let my jaw relax". 

(You can check if it is relaxed by testing if you can move it from side to side and up and down).

 

Then say to yourself,  " I have nothing I have to do now so I just can let my arms relax" 

 

Then say to yourself " I have nowhere I have to go now so I can just let my legs relax" 

 

[NOTE:  The phrase "I can just let  my jaw/arms/legs relax "   is also a gentle way of giving yourself this suggestion and conducive to relaxing]

 

Combining all of the steps:  Keep up the first two steps-- breathing and peripheral vision while cycling through the third and fourth step.