Managing Your States

Managing Your States

Date: 5/6/2014

State Management is a big principle in NLP because your State drives your behaviors.   Therefore your general success in life, your ability to achieve various tasks, and the quality of your relationships all depend  to a large extent on your state.  

What, exactly, is a "State"? Your state at any given moment is the sum total of the effect on you of all of the stimuli you are dealing with at that moment. This means that your state is in constant flux. Sometimes the changes may be barely noticeable and at other times the changes may be very dramatic.

Our states are are a product of two factors:  Our thoughts and how we feel physically.

Thoughts:  Whatever is on your mind is going to influence how you feel.  Are you happy about something or sad?   Are you thinking about something that makes you worry or relax?   Are you reminiscing about good times or brooding about bad ones?  We don't have a lot of control over the actual events that take place in our lives, but we can learn how to react to our life events in a more resourceful way--and thereby influence our state. We can also learn how to control our thoughts.

Physical feelings: Are you hungry or satiated? Tired or well rested? Comfortable or uncomfortable? Do you feel too hot, too cold, or just right? In this area we usually have more control of our situation.    If we are hungry we can eat something, if we are tired we can take a nap, etc.  In NLP they say that changing your physiology is the fastest way to change your state. You can change your state in a minute by changing your posture, changing the way you are breathing, or by putting a smile (or a frown) on your face. 

The question is: Is your current state limiting or resourceful? 

 NLP has a number of techniques to help people make the shift from limiting to resourceful states and to maintain resourceful states. I don't like to exaggerate so I am going to add one qualification to the previous sentence:   to a certain extent.

In other words, if you have some pressing problem...let's say you have to make a payment and do not have the funds available to make it, you will probably go into a limiting state.  I can teach you how to reduce the influence of that limiting state to the extent that you will be able to function better.  You may still feel some of the unpleasant feeling about the payment, but it won't stop you from going about your daily routine.  In most situations, that is enough.  And, the truth is that since at the end of the day you do have to make that payment or suffer the consequences of not making it, it is a good thing that you still retain some of the unpleasant feeling associated with the problem you have to deal with.  That feeling will serve as a reminder to take action and make the payment. 

I teach relaxation techniques which help a lot to reduce stress--one of the main culprits that puts us into limiting states.

Here is a very easy and inexpensive life style change you can start right now which will help you be in a more energized state throughout the day.   I heard this from my family doctor.   One of the main causes of fatigue is not drinking enough water (Notice that I said "water", not coffee, tea, or sodas).   He recommends drinking two glasses of water first thing in the morning. You have been fasting the whole night while you were sleeping and your body needs it.  During the day make sure that you drink about 2 litres of water.  I have passed this little piece of advice on to a number of people and they all told me that it has made a difference to them. 

Another good habit to help you to be in positive, resourceful states is to exercise regularly (but speak to your doctor about how much is good for you). And, if you like to go first class, consider joining a physical fitness program. I personally have experience with an expert trainer who I can recommend. Chaim Mandel has an online fitness program that is definitely worth checking out.  For more information click on his website: www.directcombatives.com  (Click on the "Fitness" link or Scroll down until you get to "Fitness Training")

To schedule an appointment contact me by phone: 052-763 7029 or by email: shlomokory@gmail.com 

© Copyright.  All rights reserved to Shlomo Kory, Jerusalem, Israel